What we build

Posted: Saturday, 19 May, 2012 by deacongray in Uncategorized
What We Build
By Deacon Gray

I think we have all had the experience of joining something new. The excitement of exploration, the thrill of joining the project, even if the project is nothing more than becoming a piece of the puzzle that makes the community a community.

People have always come together. Individuals form families, families form tribes, tribes become communities. As long as we continue building, we continue to grow. When we stop building, and rest on our backsides too long, all around us things start to break down.
We have seen in countries like Rome where growth has stopped, the connections break down, and soon so does the country itself unless it finds collectively a new stage of growth. Without it, the internal strife starts to take place. Factions develop, differences become disputes and disputes become full blown conflict, or worse yet apathy.

So you might be wondering what this has to do with our community, or perhaps you already know where I am going with all this. Look around us and it becomes pretty obvious. Our community isn’t the place we once found, it isn’t the place we hoped…even deluded ourselves into believing to be a reality.

New people come in, they are so filled with opportunism, searching and seeking and trying to become part of the machine, but what they find instead is fractionalization, bickering, and conflict at every turn, unless they are lucky enough to find an organization that moves past it, one that builds and grows, but even those are under constant attack and, sadly they are few.

Think of our connection to the community as a couple coming together. When they first come together they are building something. They build a relationship that either works, or it doesn’t. If that works they look toward building a family. Once they have a family they build together for the sake of that family. Everything from finding out what the family does together, to how they interact and develop their relationships. Success follows as long as those building, and growing blocks continue to be the focus. In some cases the blocks start to tumble right away, in other cases those bounds grow past the simple family and move to a more complex one.

What we seem to face more and more with in the community is a lack of those bonds. Our community is like a family that once the kids are raised and out of the house no longer has a focus to keep them together. Instead all of the kids are off trying to develop their own families and totally rebelling against the family they once had.

People often ask me why some of us move to tight knit groups and houses, well for me that is simple, its because we want to form those bonds, to be apart of something that grows with us as part of it. Many leave their houses and organizations because there isn’t enough growth, or because the growth factor was never there to begin with. Houses like that soon crumble.

Look at the successful Houses, not those most loved by the community, but those that have lasted despite the popular opinion and what do you see? The AVA has a purpose, its members are growing individually and the AVA grows in purpose. Another less popular group in the OVC is Father Sebastiaans organization. With as much Ire as the community on and off line has for that group, it continues to grow because they have a focus of purpose, a drive. Another example is the House I am involved in. The House of The Dreaming continues by dedicating itself to projects, by keeping those family connections. Look at those organizations, like them or not, and then ask yourself if you are part of something productive. Wasn’t that what you were looking for when you came here?

Growth happens in what we build together, who we are is better defined when we have goals and a purpose besides bickering and drama. When people look back 20 years from now they are not going to remember the bickering children, they are going to remember the things that were productive and meaningful. They are going to look at what we built together, not what small groups of individuals did to break things down.
What we build matters, but in the very act of building we find often the individual growth we have been looking for.

Deacon Gray
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Posts: 1457
Joined: Fri Apr 14, 2006 1:08 pm
Location: ID
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Comments
  1. Griffin says:

    Thanks good to read this. Being fairly new to community and a baby boomer to boot there might still be hope in finding a house out there yet!

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