The Ward/ Mentor Bond

Posted: Thursday, 23 August, 2012 by deacongray in Articles of Interest, Community Articles
The Ward/ Mentor Bond© Aislin Ni MorRhiaghan, January 2008When we first enter the community we are green as grass but have at best read fiction of our kind. Some may even have been fortunate enough to have read articles or come across forums such as this and have been able to gather some information regarding their nature and healthy ways to maintain and live their lives. At some point a young one may also desire the formal training and education that can only be received from a mentor, someone of good standing within the community who is knowledgeable about the Nightkind nature and is in a position to train and nurture. Choosing a mentor is not easy work. Research is a must as is compatability and a willingness to work on the part of the intended ward. A ward who expects their mentor to tell them everything within a month or two is out of luck. A ward/mentor relationship may carry on for years even decades as a healthy relationship often thrives on the advice of the mentor and the respect of the ward. A ward who does not listen to the counsel and teaching of the mentor does not respect their teacher. The teacher who does not value the challenges of a willful ward may forget what it was like when they first entered the community. Sometimes willfulness and disrespect is wrought not with hatred or arrogance but with fear and lack of self acceptance of one’s nature. All in all one should nurture the best qualities in the other in order to build a healthy bond between them.

Wards are typically those who have awakened or in the process of awakening although they may also be Dhampyre as well (those who are born aware of their nature and partially if not fully awakened). They may be referred to their mentor via word of mouth or they may simply come across their writing or other form of reference and seek them out. It is important for the ward to understand that even though the mentor is there to provide a positive experience they are certainly responsible for their own education and at best in part responsible for the bond that forms. Someone seeking mentorship should be of legal age and of a positive state of mind. A good spiritual background of life affirming philosophy is a good sign that the person seeking mentorship is willing to study and progress their lives on all levels. Although the vampyre nature is not always based solely in the spiritual, it helps to have a path in place whether left or right that balances and grounds the person. An unbalanced ward is less likely to be receptive to constructive criticism and advice and more likely to get into mischief.

Mentors are those who are the teachers of the community and who have earned the right to mentor through years of experience and wisdom. A person will have many mentors throughout their life on both dayside and nightside. These are the people who have helped shape the person you are and the person you will become through integrity, wisdom, and respect. They may be the math teacher in high school that took the extra time to help you, the coach that lifted your spirits when you were down, the pastor or priestess that aided you spiritually, or the vampyre who aided you in your awakening. They are the most balanced of the community having achieved Twilight and a good understanding of both human and Nightkind nature. The experiences that they pass on are drops of wisdom learned in their younger days. When your mentor speaks, listen. Speak your mind with respect and honor, they have earned both.

Generally speaking the ward mentor bond is a close one. It may range from deep friendship to one of familial attachment. Be close but not too close. Mentors should understand that their ward is learning and will make mistakes. Wards should arm themselves with fortitude and acumen as to be willing to grow. Both should be tempered with grace and patience. Life happens. Sometimes things interfere causing other things to be postponed or altered altogether. Adaptability and flexibility are integral as each must adapt not only to their own changes in life but also to each other’s so that they are better suited to work together.

Sometimes your adra and your mentor will be the same person. Many times they will not. Choose your ward as you would your chylde/nadja as they will reflect upon you for good or ill simply because of their attachment. Protect them as you would your donor but do not shelter them. Young ones warrant warnings of danger otherwise they would not be aware of them. This community shimmers with a dark gleam. It is easy for a young one to become awed by it and by individuals who do not have their best interest at heart. However as all children do, they will make their own decisions. The purpose of a mentor is guidance. Generally speaking I may warn a young one once of trouble. I will not do so a second time should they not heed my advice the first time. The Nightkind community is not a kind one, nor is it forgiving. It is not fashioned from doves but from wolves, often in sheep’s clothing. If a young one is to grow within this community they must be aware of the dangers and pitfalls as well as the pleasures and rewards. Should they stumble but not dishonor theirself or their mentor, they are well and good to continue tutelage. Should they be dishonored beyond repair or cause dishonor or disgrace to fall upon the shoulders of their mentor, they are lost. Redemption (the public act of forgiveness by a sire/adra or mentor for their ward or chylde/nadja) is at the discretion of the mentor. The final decision should always be respected as it was made for a good reason.

Should the bond be one of adra and nadja, the bond will be deeper because of the act of communion. This relationship will carry an intimacy that mentoring will not. They will develop an empathy for each other and gifts such as the beacon, telepathy, shared thoughts and dreams will be strong between them. This is because of the heightened awareness that one has triggered within the other. The elevated vibration of the nadja allows them to be sympathetic and receptive to the vibration of the adra thus acutely sensitive and aware of their presence and state. This is in place to aid the adra in the growth and protection of their nadja. No two students will learn the same way, nor will they learn in the same period of time. Some will take longer to work with while some breeze through their study. Many will only be able to learn from working within through experience and hands on teaching, although not necessarily physical activity. This has been my manner of teaching for quite a while and I’ve found it to be very effective. This bond between the two is also in place so that when the energy of the nadja is high they may be pushed. When the energy is low, it is time to rest and choose another form of study that moves the nadja inward for personal and spiritual foundation rather than outward which moves them to a more active place.

Your adra like your mentors, will be the person you have the most contact with throughout your tenure within the Nightkind community. Be as sure of your choice to be active within it as your choice of mentors and sire. You will only have one sire. You will have many mentors. To be chosen as nadja is an honor. To accept the right one is a gift. To be mentored is an offering. They should all be respected.

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