BEEN THERE DONE THAT AD NAUSEAUM

By: Belfazaar Ashantison

OK you new cats and old dogs within the GVC (Greater Vampire Community… Yes. I am officially done with separation of online and offline communities), I thought I would take the time to write about a couple of topics today that are close to the breaking point, as far as the nerves of some of the older members of the community goes.

Did you ever stop to wonder the “why” of a situation instead of reacting to the “who” of the situation? Most newcomers to the Greater Vampire Community, whether online or off, forget that the community has been around, solidly, for more than a few decades. I, myself, have been a full member of the community since the age of 13 back in 1978. It seems, as things tend to be VERY cyclic in the GVC, that no matter how much times has passed, ideas continue to respawn within the community in ways that are, at best, mildly entertaining. At their worst, they are frustrating beyond the level of human comprehension… At least it seems that way to those of us who have been in the community for more than just a few years.

As Mark Twain said, “There is no such thing as a new idea. It is impossible. We simply take a lot of old ideas and put them into a sort of mental kaleidoscope. We give them a turn and they make new and curious combinations. We keep on turning and making new combinations indefinitely; but they are the same old pieces of colored glass that have been in use through all the ages.”

This means, quite simply put, that those of us who have been in the community for more than a decade (hell, sometimes for only five years, depending on what movies, books or remakes of fictional vampires hits the time), we’ve probably seen, tried, done, failed at, and/or bickered over a specific proposal 5 or 6 times (at least). So the general attitude of anyone who has been a while in the community is “Been there. Done that. Ad nauseum.” Why do we have this attitude? Because you’re not doing anything, saying anything, writing anything that we haven’t already done, heard or seen. No matter what pretty package you wrap it up in, it’s the same.

“Why isn’t there UNITY in the Community??”
Take, for example, the call for “Unity in the Community”. As of last year, by my count, there have been 27 major attempts to unify the community under this banner or that banner, for this reason or for that reason. Three alone IN 2015. Each of these attempts have been produced by a person who has either a) not been received as the “ultimate savior of the GVC” so they decided to start their own thing and place themselves at the top of the pyramid scheme they’ve cooked up or b) a person who was so butthurt by other members of the community for not seeing their “obvious value to the community”, so they started THEIR own thing assuming leadership as a reward for their many many seconds of work within the community as a whole, or c) by that person who once worked within the community and left for whatever reasons but on their return they felt they deserved to be automatically recognized for their past deeds instead of anything current, so instead of working through established organizations and rebuilding connections, they create their own endeavor and, per usual, place themselves at the top of the heap.

Don’t believe me, take a look at the myriad of Councils created around the Country (US, folks). A posh selection of the who’s who of the community wedged into this group or that, many of us in a myriad of groups seeing the same “topic of interest” hit each group at roughly the same time with a lot of hashing and rehashing the same things out by the myriad of members within each of the groups. To what end? NOTHING GETS DONE ABOUT THEM.

None of these “unity” attempts have ever taken into account that what flies in one area of the Country (the US) doesn’t fly in another, let alone doesn’t even get off the ground in the REST OF THE WORLD. As in, what works in the NYC area doesn’t fly in the New Orleans area. What works in Los Angeles does not fly in Tampa. What works in Las Vegas does not fly in Austin. This is NEVER taken into consideration.

BEYOND all of this, these self same groups ALWAYS trend towards making their “laws” universal. MEANING, it doesn’t matter if you are part of their group/community/organization, their rules and findings STILL apply to you. Sorry to tell you, folks, I don’t fly that way. If I am not part of your organization, don’t expect your rules and findings to even amount to a hill of gnat farts in my world, because they will surely be just as applicable to me. And, just to put this out here, I’m NOT the only longtime community member who feels this way.

In honesty, we can’t focus on such things as “unity” because we haven’t even begun to take the necessary steps to define such things as “vampirism”… the very essence of what makes a vampire a vampire… to the degree where we can accurately acknowledge and address those of us who truly do identify as vampire. Nor have we bothered to consider things such as WHY don’t things flow from area to area? What caused the breakdown from one portion of the community to the next? Is it a regional thing? Is it a seasonal thing? Or were the people who created the original system simply not concerned with other areas of the world (let alone Country) so they only concerned themselves with what was going on in their own neck of the woods (if you’ll pardon the pun)?

Elders vs Leaders:
Another heated topic that seems to make the cycle every few months or so is the whole thing about “the Elders should be responsible for…”… … … Really? REALLY? I’m not responsible for anyone but me, my home and my vampiric House. I’m an Elder in the community through my work WITH the community, which SERIOUSLY began at age 25 even though I had been in the community much earlier. It used to be that a person had to be active within the community for a total of 10 years before anyone considered them an Elder (and remember, I’ve been active in the community since I was 13). Back then, when I first reached Elder status, it merely meant “glorified servant of the community who had a bit of wisdom they could spread… given the right circumstances.” Somewhere, after a few Elders, such as myself, either created their own Houses or became the leaders of Houses, that definition seemed to twist to mean “leader of the community”… IT DOESN’T… It didn’t then. It doesn’t now. We took the term “Elder” from other communities because it was something we felt fit those who ACTIVELY endorsed the community and helped it to grow. It was never meant to be synonymous with “Leader”. Elders were the wise men and women of other communities that offered their experiences and wisdom when approached properly.

And I DO mean “when approached properly”…

Enter the question of LEADERSHIP… A “Leader” is someone who, simply, for right or wrong, leads a group/action. They are in charge of that group/action and are the final say so in what that group/action will do, won’t do, puts up with, won’t put up with, has, doesn’t have, keeps, and tosses away… just to name a few things… They aren’t automatically “Elders” and can be called a myriad of titles. More often than not, those titles are respected by other members of the community, however, there are those in the community who will poo poo ANYTHING they aren’t, actively, part of, no matter HOW much good that group/action does.

There have EVEN been articles written on holding “Elders” accountable, which in reality should be “Leaders”. Got news for you, MOST of the Elders I associate with ARE held accountable by their own groups for what THOSE GROUPS consider them to be responsible for. If those Elders happen to be Leaders, as well, they fall into a whole separate column of accountability that no other member of the community, save those that fall under them, are in a position to do anything about. HOWEVER, these particular articles demand that ALL Elders be held accountable for EVERY OTHER Elder. *BUZZ!!* Wrong. Think again. As with my earlier statement, your judgment of me, what I do, who I represent and what I should be held accountable for amount to a hill of gnat farts in a whirlwind as far as I’m concerned. Sorry folks, however, the way I see it… If Elder A screws the pooch, Elders B, C, and D are NOT responsible for cleaning up A’s mess and no amount of forcing the issue will change my mind on this.

Any group out there is ONLY as good as their Leader, yet, the converse of that is true as well… Any Leader out there is ONLY as good as the group they are leading. If the group is a roguish mob, the Leader will tend to act that way, as well. If the group is one of quiet contemplation, self examination, and self empowerment, again, the Leader will tend to act that way, as well. If the group is a Hell hole of impish behaviors, disrespectful attitudes, and “It’s my way or the highway” types… Well. I think, if you’re actually reading this, you get the picture.

A Leader is only as good as the quality of individuals within the group/action they are leading. Period. Yes. Some Leaders don’t fit a group/action, this is quickly established during the initial period of a Leader’s embarking in leadership of that particular group/action, however, it is usually also quickly resolved with “new” leadership being thrust into the position as quickly as the former Leader is flung FROM that position.

While I am on the topic of Leaders being flung from a position of leadership from a group/action… Parting ways with a group/action… Why the hell do we have to make it such a difficulty? Why the games and intrigues? Can’t we just simply choose to part ways without one side or the other attempting to slander the reputation of the other? Can it not just be, “well, I’m sorry you feel that way, I wish you well on your way…” and be done with it? Where does it say or where is it written that we have to act like a bunch of friggin five year olds who lost their toys or lost a game? Really. REALLY. Sometimes people just need to friggin grow the fuck up and move on. If you didn’t like THAT particular group/action, find one that works well with your own personal ideas of what a group/action should be and LEAVE IT AT THAT.

Back to Leaders and Leadership. Faulting every Elder or Leader for the actions of one or two just doesn’t do a damned thing. No matter how you slice it, each person is responsible for themselves and SHOULD be held accountable for THEIR actions. I don’t like getting blamed or treated poorly/disrespectfully for someone else’ bad actions. Therefore I DON’T DO IT TO OTHERS. If YOU, yourself, did something to me, I am game for a LITTLE attitude (Lord only knows I WILL sling some), however… AFTER the initial shock of “that bitch just fucked up,” I tend to go back to being my docile self, thinking before I speak/write anything so as not to provoke a series of “As the Fledgling Flaps” drama that tends to spread throughout the community like wildfire through dense, dry brush.

The “Blame Game”…

I don’t know about the rest of you, however, I get sick to FUCKING DEATH with the bloody blame game that seems to be the domain of certain individuals within the community. It is never, “I’m sorry. I fucked up.” It is ALWAYS, well, you see the newbie/fake vampire that is in my group’s/action’s fault. Or. The “community” is fucked up because of all the “fake newbies/vampires”…

No. The GVC was fucked up LONG before these particular new people, whether vampire, seeker or wannabe, came into being. Laying the blame on them instead of facing the REAL problems within the community shows that you haven’t clue fucking one what is really going on within the community and you are only a drama llama attempting to pull the focus off your own fucked up version of what’s been going on to this point in the history of the community. Indeed, the problem is MUCH deeper and are truly more encompassing than simply, and lamely, laying the blame on “fake newbies”. We have got Elders who’ve abused their power for YEARS. We’ve got people who aren’t made to feel special enough starting their own shit instead of working with established organizations, all for the need to feel like they, themselves, are a power and totally go out of their way to fuck with whatever group/action they either left or got booted from.

There’s a SERIOUS lack of direction within the GVC, itself, that causes new members to become jaded quickly as they see what some of the older members act like. There’s a lack of clarity as to what makes a vampire a vampire, let alone a simple fucking universally accepted working definition of what “vampirism” even is. We have a SERIOUS lack of smacking the disruptive influences down so that serious conversations/discussions/heated debates COULD finally lead somewhere other than the stupid lack of movement we currently have. We have a plethora of members, newer and older, cyber-bullying people who don’t automatically bend over and kiss their ass accepting every word that falls from their lips or crawls across their screen as the “Gospel Truth according to Jon Q Vampire”. We’ve got people who ACTIVELY try to promote the idea that vampirism is merely a religious/spiritual condition afflicting the soul and anyone who disagrees with their idea is just trying to mislead others… ON TOP OF all of this the people who are preaching “if I can get off blood, you can” bullshit actively ignoring the fact that basic human development has proven that not everyone can do the same things… If they could, I’d be damn sure painting like Rembrandt or Renoir by now… We have a plethora of idiots perpetuating fake wars between vampires and therians (more to the point vampires and werewolves a la Underworld movies) that PURPOSELY try to disrupt groups where both vampires and therians participate. We have an ever present perpetuation of hostilities between sangs/psys that started YEARS ago and seems to be on a particularly nasty cycle as it rears its ugly head from time to time. The original line sparking the hostilities back in the days of the Vampire Church was “sangs are nothing but psys on training wheels”.

We have a contingent of “Olde Guard”, as well as a few newer members of the community, continually belittling the Donors of the community. We have a contingent of older members of the community who hold no civility whatsoever as they belittle any new people asking questions to try and get a better understanding of who and what they are. Which is NEVER easy in a world like this. We have a whole plethora of people pretending they are the direct lineage of Vlad/Lestat/Elizabeth/Dracula/name a fictional vampire and everyone should bow down and grant them automatic title/status in whatever group/action they deem themselves worthy enough to participate in… And then there is the ever present “Kiss My Ring” crowd which many of our local communities splintered from because we were tired of being treated lower than a snakes belly if we didn’t dress/talk/appear/smell like them or hang with anyone they considered to be of any import…

These are REAL issues that NEED to be addressed within the GVC, as a whole, that are, more often than not, simply swept under the rug and tolerated.
So… Do you FINALLY see why some people within the community might have an attitude when you bring up for the umpteenth time, ‘we should do this endeavor to better the community because it’s a brilliant idea that I just suddenly come up with’…
Suck it up, Buttercups. It isn’t going to change until we take steps to tackle the REAL issues within the community.
“Once More Into the Breech”
Some of the older members of the community will NEVER understand that, for whatever reason, that the nature of the community is cyclic and that these cycles will always bring the same questions… Over and over and over ad nauseum. The reason these questions are cyclic, and no matter the wording, are ALWAYS THE SAME is that these new people in the community have never had anyone to ask these questions of. They shouldn’t be treated like they are idiots asking an already answered question with statements like, “if you just simply look through the prior topics, you’ll see that your question has been answered before more than a few times.” Or “this shit again?” Or anything like it. The question(s) should be answered to the best of our abilities, whether we’re tired of the question(s) or not. For no other reason than the fact that WE were there once. Some of us, such as myself, were lucky enough to have Elders that helped them along the way… Others have not been so lucky. The plan is simple. Take the questions with a grain of salt, pound of sugar, and, when need be, a good stiff drink.

It really is that simple. Answer the questions. If you don’t feel like it… LET SOMEONE ELSE DO IT. Just don’t bitch when one of them turns out to be one of those “fakes” you’re so ready to blame for all the other problems within the community.
Well. That’s all from me for now. Hope this article will help someone out there.

Ashe and be blessed,
Belfazaar Ashantison,
Founder and Elder, House of Mystic Echoes
Founding member of the New Orleans Vampire Association (NOVA)

Project Hephæstus’ Forge: The Left Hand Path, Wrathful Emotions, and Greater Black Magick

By Stephanie Lovecs

Wednesday, 14 October 2015

Anger doesn’t seem to get any respect. Many people try to avoid or repress the negative emotions like anger, envy, and jealousy, because they can take over your mind and influence you into negative behavior. However, some people get some sort of satisfaction from these emotions, in spite of the negative influence they have on our minds. Repressing these emotions can lead to extreme behavior when they finally do surface, so repression is not a satisfactory option. Satisfying these emotions as they arise makes you a slave to them with only short term satisfaction and often with long term problems that will have to be cleared up.

So is there another way of dealing with the wrathful emotions? Indeed, there is.

One aspect of the Left Hand Path is to examine the more negative aspects of your personality in order to understand them and transform them into something more satisfactory, so let’s take a quick look at them to get some understanding, and then apply a bit of reasoning that may lead to a way to transform them.

The wrathful emotions are based upon dislike, and are useful in removing or getting around unsatisfactory obstacles. You can approach obstacles from an intelligent manner and skillfully resolve them, or you can try to use force to smash through them. Anger will give you an adrenaline rush that could be channeled into force, but is there another way to channel this extra energy? Let’s examine anger a bit more closely:

When you are angry, the accompanying adrenaline rush not only energizes your body, but it also energizes your mind. Before you became angry, your mind was relatively clear and calm, like a lake or a slow moving stream. However, a myriad of energized emotions screaming for attention can quickly turn the calm waters into a cloudy, boiling rage that is anything but clear.

With an energized body and a clouded mind, it would seem that the option of dealing with obstacles by force would be the only way, as it is difficult to go the intelligent route by examining the obstacle when your mind in such a state. Your clouded state of mind is an obstacle to the intelligent route. {Wait a minute–aren’t wrathful emotions useful in removing or getting around obstacles? Indeed they are!}

Your first obstacle to deal with is your clouded, boiling raging mind. Direct the energy from the adrenaline rush there first, and remove the clouded state from your mind first. Then you will be able to think clearly enough to take the intelligent route for the external problem. {You apply Greater Black Magick to yourself, first, and then you turn to the objective universe ;)}

Anger is a quick and strong emotion. It can quickly silence the other disturbing emotions within your mind to still the boiling activity impeding your ability to think clearly. Once the mind has been cleared, the rush of energy can then be channeled into mental activity in order to find an intelligent solution to the external problem, instead of resorting to force.

You have overcome not just one obstacle, (the external problem,) but two obstacles (counting the obstacle of the clouded mind.) When you realize and appreciate benefits of this, the disturbing emotions will welcome and respect anger, and energy will not need to be expended in silencing these disturbing emotions, as they will be pacified by anger. However, when this point has been reached, anger doesn’t seem to resemble what it used to be. It has transformed so much that even the name “anger” doesn’t seem to fit anymore.

So, what has this emotion formerly-known-as-anger become? What name would be suitable for this force that can quickly clear the mind, yet super energize it as well? {Wow! It sounds almost magickal, huh?} I have some names for what a thought-pacifying-mind energizing force can be used as a basis for, including:

⦁ Mushin (Zen)

⦁ Samatha (Eastern religions)

⦁ the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th Rupa Jhanas (Buddhism)

⦁ Shyine (Tibetan)

⦁ Samadhi (Eastern religions)

⦁ Pure Awareness (Advaita)

⦁ Clearing the Grounds to Alaya (Yogacara)

⦁ The Magickal Trance described in Peter J Carroll’s Liber Null (Liber MMM)

⦁ Kensho (Zen)

The only real name that I have come across to describe this transformed anger is Great Mirror Wisdom. (If you know of any other names for it, please let me know.) Whatever you may call it, it can be the platform/basis for all of the spiritual practices listed above and more, as well as the more down-to-earth tool for dealing with mundane obstacles in everyday life.

So, even if you are not spiritually or magically inclined, it is still worthwhile to apply Hephæstus’ Forge to your anger and transform it for the clarity of mind and problem-solving ability it gives in everyday matters, as well as liberation from being enslaved to its more base expression.

Free your mind!

© H☿D Herald of The Dawn 2NLE

Psychic Vampires, or Energy Manipulator?

By Deacon Gray
(c) Graveyard Press 3/15/2015

There are many views on the subject matter known as Psychic Vampires.  Anton LeVay considered them people who drain people of their vital energy, but fill no useful purpose in our lives, not as lovers, or real friends.  In his view a psychic vampire manipulated you, makes you feel indebted, and plays on your emotional sense of moral obligation.

Modern Living Psychic Vampires, would say something else altogether. The basic belief is that there is energy, one that people produce naturally, that Psychic Vampires cannot produce sufficiently, but they can siphon off others.

Dr. Bruce Goldberg, a Dentist, with a Masters in Counseling, and BA in Biology and Chemistry on other hand referred to the Energy vampire as “an unhappy lot, and do their damage by a telepathic draining of their victim’s energy resources.

Michelle Belanger’s version is more likely to be accepted by the group we call the Vampire Community today. “Psychic vampires are people who prey on the vital, human life energies of others. They are not believed to be undead. They are mortal people whose need for energy metaphorically connects them to the life-stealing predators of vampire myth.”

But what are they?  I think one of the issues is in separating the so called Psychic Vampire that people like LaVey spoke of, and those who fancy themselves an actual vampire with some difference from a standard human.

Most of the so called Energy, or Psychic vampires out there aren’t vampires in the least, but merely people who have managed to get others to waste their own energy on drama, trolling, or confrontationist’s discussions.

LaVey was speaking about those psychic vampires, those who we waste valuable time and energy on, not those who have an actual energy drawing ability.

The expenditure of your own energy as a choice is not the same as having energy drawn from you. Nearly every time there is a debate and someone says…”You’re feeding!!” the case from my point of view is that no feeding is taking place, only expenditure.

Levay had one thing right; we shouldn’t allow ourselves to be sucked in by those who are draining to us. It really doesn’t accomplish anything other than to waste our time and energy on fruitless efforts. Most all of the bickering is wasted time, and leads ultimately to nothing but ill feelings.

What’s actually more dangerous,  the psychic vampire who might take a little energy and make you feel a little worn out, or a energy manipulator who is simply trying to engage you in a manner that makes you use energy in a such a pointless way, and leaves you dealing with unpleasant emotions like anger? How often do they use emotional blackmail, or attempt to drag you down for the sake of proving their own intelligence?

How many projects, written works, movement toward personal growth is wasted on such people?  What is ever really gained by it? How do energy manipulators serve anyone except themselves?

People could claim the same about psychic vampires, but and ethical psychic vampire leaves you with no ill effect, and often become great friends. They might even drain off your negative energy and leave you feeling more at peace. If they are really skilled, they might even help you find your own means of controlling those negative energies.

There are a lot of ways you can protect yourself from both of these types of people. The most powerful of which is simply not engaging with them once you figured out what they are.  Sadly figuring out who they are, isn’t always something you can do right away.  Once you have identified them, don’t waste further time on them.

Energy manipulators, whether conscious of it or not, want to get in close. They want to become someone you deal with regularly. They might realize they are interacting with you in a way that is manipulating your energy, but they do it more often than not. For this reason you have to leave them behind, because even if you know they are doing it, doesn’t mean you can stop them. Your defenses are not designed for every day, all day, usage, which in itself is a major manipulation.

Consider who you align yourself with, who you spend time around and how they make you feel. If you can honestly say that you feel frustrated, angry or exhausted by someone more often than inspired, moved, or kindly toward, than why  keep them around?

I understand that It’s not always that simple.  My own step mother is a major energy manipulator, despite that I like the lady, and it’s not like my father is going to kick her out of his house anytime soon.  You can adapt by limiting what you tell such a person about your life. Keeping and energy manipulator in the realm without allowing them to be active in your sphere of energy and daily activity is possible.

In the end I would just like to say this. Look at how a person makes you spend your energy, if it is for negative reasons, consider why you allow them to do so. Your energy is yours to control. It is up to you to decide how much you will allow an energy manipulator to taint your energy. It is up to you to decide if you want to engage in their pointlessness, or seek and grow on your own path, surrounded by pleasant, nurturing friends.

 

http://kheperu.org/

http://www.drbrucegoldberg.com/EnergyVampires.htm
http://cparker15.tripod.com/tsb/airVII.html “Not all vampires suck blood!”

The Awakening Mind of a Vampire

The Awakening Mind of a Vampire

By Belfazaar  Ashantison (c) 2015 Feb 2

Oddly enough, I have seen a bazillion different awakening stories and awakening theories, however none of these actually emulated what it was like for me, what I felt nor what I thought, so… As I found a way to express this finally, I thought I would put it here in the hopes that it may one day help someone else…We already know the old cliche that most of us felt… removed… set apart…  different from those around us, but what does that truly mean?

 

For me, it meant that there was a great sense of loneliness, as if I were perpetually trying to fit me, a square peg, into the rest of society, a round hole.  I perpetually felt as if something that had been missing were JUST out of reach…  Seconds away from my grasp and moving away each time I moved towards it…  Making me feel even MORE isolated from those around me…  I truly felt out of step to the point of feeling out of place and time.Among other things I felt, the internal argument of whether this was a curse or a gift began to roil through my heart and mind, as if I were literally on the verge of a civil war with my own being.  I remember thinking “why is this happening to me?  why can’t I just be… normal?” Though I was being taught how to handle things, this argument raged through my mind, ripping at my heart until my whole world was in a tailspin…

 

No matter how intellectual I was, no matter how much I learned, it was as if the words never seemed to be there to properly describe what I was going through…  Words just simply failed to fully illustrate what was raging through the very core of my being. Questions burned through my mind as to whether I was truly going through something or if it were all in my head.  Add to this, the doctors couldn’t seem to find anything other than the usual compliment of things, so there was no true way to know exactly WHAT was happening to me.  No medical/scientific explanation could be readily found.

 

After a couple of botched attempts, followed by laughter, harassment and the usual bullying came a deep, hesitant and always yearning question… “who can I share this with? why doesn’t anyone else feel the way I do?  why isn’t anyone else going through this?”…  Which, in its turn, added to the original sense of loneliness and being set apart…

 

It was becoming a vicious cycle…

 

WHEN I began to truly accept what was going on with me, I began to feel as if I were a new creation wearing a costume…  That costume being the old self…  Same body, different being altogether…  Which became another thing which I couldn’t discuss with anyone…  This did not, however, add to the sensation of loneliness.  Instead, it added something else.  It added a sense of a closeness to my Spiritual Path, though it was truly a separate being altogether.  I began to feel as if what I was going through was part of something…  well… grander…  As if the eyes of the Universe itself had suddenly fallen on me, watching which way I would go with this new-found sense of being part of some grand design…

 

Remember ladies and gentlemen, I was a 13 year old boy going through this…  For me to be set apart to this point was confusing, heart-wrenching and exhilarating all at one time…

 

When I finally accepted that this was what I truly was, it was almost as if this unknown weight had been lifted off my shoulders.  As if everything FINALLY began to make sense…  It has been truly a long and exhilarating journey, once I accepted this IS what I am.

 

I AM vampire.  I WAS born this way.  In this knowledge, no matter who doubts, scoffs or disbelieves, I am strong, secure and comfortable.

Words of Prey

1-31-2015 (c) graveyard press
by Deacon Gray

Recently, Gordon Smith, of the Facebook group CLAVIS (Current and Longitudinal Analyses of the Vampire-Identifying Subculture) started what he calls a Academic/scientific Inquiry into, “The online discussion boards of the vampire-identifying subculture have long been associated with irascibility, but possible constructive consequences of these impassioned public debates go largely overlooked”

It is a long standing, but reasonably under considered topic in the vampire community as a whole. Why is that we have so many impassioned debates? Is it really just the VC, or has it become and epidemic in our post internet developed society?

If it were just the information Mr. Smith presented to us, I don’t think I would have considered it all much, likewise if it were just the rare story on the news about a bullied kid committing suicide or for that matter I might not have thought about it much at all but with even the “This American Life” story called “If you don’t have anything nice to say, SAY IT IN ALL CAPS!’ budding to my attention.

Perhaps it is because I too like a good on line debate. I like to engage people and challenge myself. I like to play the better game, as it were, or at times educate the masses. Yet how is it that anything I do on line is so worth getting worked up about? How is it that the right challenge by someone can so easily set my predatory mind in motion? Is there something about the medium itself, this generation, or perhaps the safety of the format?

I counted five threads closed on the Vampire Community News since Dec 31 2014. In each one of those comments went from questioning, to reasonable, to explanatory, than all out name calling. Is this because we try to get through to people and when that fails, screaming at them is the next appropriate step? Is mocking them the right course of action? What about spreading the world to various other groups about what a horrid person/troll/asshat the person might be?

Is appropriate to stalk them on line and troll them? What about make threats, or make statements like “ I wish you would just killed yourself?” When is it too far? When do we as individuals write something like “You’re the dumbest person I have ever met!” or “I hope that gross slug of a fat girl in green chokes on her diet soda and dies!”

These are actual statements I read in posts today. Not posts in a forum, but in response to something as innocuous as a video posted on Facebook. How could someone in a video on Facebook make you so mad that you have to resort to attacking their appearance because you don’t like what they are saying? How did that become ok?

I don’t think there is ever and excuse. Oh sure I have fought fire with fire before, or even tried to shake someone up by taunting them in a rather ruthless manner among my favorites are “Did your mother hate you? Did she feed you lead paint chips?” I also liked “Did you have a English Nanny? Did she shake you?” was it right? I read back some things one debate had said a week after an argument. I asked how they felt about the terms, only I didn’t clue them into the fact that they had been the one to says these things. “I realize you were homeschooled so you most likely have a great education and about as much sense as a zombie sheep, but don’t bring your fat ass up here thinking that you know what you are talking about.”

His response was interesting “You should never attack some ones weight. I am over weight and I know how much that hurts. I mean sure I get called fat all the time, but using it as proof of a lack of intelligence or to bully someone is fucked up.” When I showed him the whole post that included  his name he said “That was different. That was a total moron who really needed to get it knocked into her thick skull that she was being stupid. Did she put you up to this? Are you her bitch now?” Why was it that with someone who could be so rational while In the dark about identify, could turn so angry so fast over the internet? Interestingly enough talking over the phone changed things. We agreed after the call on the wording of this, because I didn’t have a voice recorder at the time.

“it’s not that I am trying to be tough, or show how smart I really am. I just don’t understand why people can’t face reality when its right in front of their face. I feel like, like I have to get into their face as well and force them to see it. It just becomes important to me that they see why they are wrong and why I am right.

Maybe it is because the internet makes it less personal. I don’t have to speak to that person again if I don’t desire too.  I know that the worst thing that can happen is that some dude on the net will be pissed for a few days, and than move on. Well I did until you tracked me down. I didn’t really think that my words, hard as they were, would mean anything. You read about people committing suicide, sure, but those people really KNOW each other. In real time I mean. It’s not the same thing- is it?”

Community Radicals and why they matter

1/18/2015 (c) GYP

by Deacon Gray

It’s foggy this morning. Outside it’s a wonderful 23 degrees outside, and inside my dog, a Staffordshire terrier mutt named Sarah, is lounging by the heater waiting for it to come on.

I am watching Helix, still bundled up in my sweater and trying to focus on making breakfast, and reading various articles from the community. In many cases it’s like reading the same radical opinions from the 90’s only now they are nearly codified by conventional population.

Back than the main topics of conversation were things like “How to develop your Vampiric power of presences” and “Who were you in your past life?” For days people discussed things like the struggles of being an empath, or how to deal with vampiric children, and yet there were radicals out there.

There are some basic concepts we look at today, that people would have come to fisticuffs over back then, and back then isn’t so far away.  Concepts like, we are just humans, not magical creatures, and we don’t have special powers.

Whether you believe that or not, those concepts are accepted today as a valid opinion. They are because some people were willing to be radical enough, and willing to take the heat, for sharing their beliefs despite the fall out to their personal reputation. Radicals.

In this community we need radicals in order to progress. We need people who are willing to step up and look at new thoughts and ideas, and present them without fear of the community going ape shit. Sadly we don’t have that luxury.

We deal with too many people who come into the community thinking they are radicals, when they are in fact simply ass holes. It can be hard to tell the difference, but if you are actually looking you can see it.

The community needs people who will inject new ideas, these are not the people who are simply defending their opinion of old concepts, but those looking forward. There will always be assholes out there. There will always be those who dig their feet in, but there will also be those who refuse to be silenced to pushed back into a corner.

People are doing it all over the world. Despite the arrogance of our US VC, and their belief that they are in some way superior because they have been around longer, places like South African, Manchester England, and Italy  we are seeing communities spring. They are radicals because they are doing it, even as so many are telling them that they are too new, too young, not well enough known to make such things happen, and yet they are happening.

It is only with Radicals from all walks of life and places in the world step up, and do those things that they see as needing done. People like those building new Houses and Courts, News organizations, and events, those who are DOING and not just complaining are the new radicals of our time, and while we complain and bitch, they are going to pass us by.

We need our radicals, but make no mistake. Simply being an ass isn’t enough. Being the smartest person in the room ( in your own opinion) isn’t enough to do that. What will do it? Challenge yourself, think about what project you could do, what part you can play, and never forget those radicals who came before you.

A Bicker of Vampires

By Deacon Gray

(c) October 2014

“I give up. I joined the community pages two months ago and all anyone every does is bitch and fight.”

 

A week ago a new member of the community contacted me after witnessing a fight break out on a Facebook message board.  He was friendly, outgoing and I had never seen him post anywhere before, so I was a little surprised to receive a message. However, rather than leave, I managed to convince him to sit down for a brief interview about what he had seen and why he feels that being in the OVC is pointless.

GYP: Will you start by telling me a little about yourself?

 

Six: Hello, my name is Travis but I have been going by a fake name. I awakened a few months ago, well transitioned anyway. I have been drawn to energy work and spiritualism and the works of Michael Ford since I was around fifteen. It’s been a few years since then, and one of my friends in who also works energy pointed out that I was constantly feeding and thought it might be a form of predatory spiritualism.
I originally thought that the whole concept was dumb, but after a trip where I found myself often isolated, I realized I couldn’t do well without being around other people and drawing energy from them. The few people I was around, were constantly drained and I noticed they didn’t want to be around me much. Sure, it could just be my sunny disposition, but once I identified the problem and started to shield myself from their energy, it was all good.

 

GYP: It sounds like you were on the right track. What brought you to the Vampire community? It seems like you had the skills needed already.

 

Six: I followed some links people posted on a message board. A few people who were on that board said they had interacted with the vampire community. They said to check out a few places to help me learn more about myself. Most of those sites weren’t very active, but there was a lot of information. That part was awesome, with the exception of the interaction part.  I suppose that is what got me to Facebook. I always swore if it was a Facebook group, I wouldn’t join, but I did.

GYP: When you contacted me it seems you were pretty dissatisfied, what brought you to that disposition?

 

Six: Well, after several months of hanging out and watching the board I realized that every single conversation seemed to dis-evolve into childish arguments. You called it a Bicker of Vampires, and I realized you didn’t just mean the conversation, but any gathering of them.

At first I didn’t think it could be that bad, I mean there are a lot of groups. So I decided to check out several of them, both on line and off line to see what the deal was.

GYP: I think this is important, would you please tell us what you found?

Six: Well I started by looking for major organizations that had a presence online. It wasn’t as easy as I thought many of the Courts have a page to like, but not many people actually interacting at any major level on line.

Eventually I found people in NYC, JY, Austin, in each on the people were more interested in social drama that any meaningful education. In one Court forum they were bitching about another Court that was starting up. “Who gave them permission to start their own Court?” and “Make sure that people know that Court is not legitimate, I don’t care what the last Regent had to say about it, or who supports it, I want to see it go away.”

In one there are people who seem to actually spread all out lies about people they don’t like. Then when caught, they try to play like they are above it, even when the proof that they planted lies is right in front of them. I’m a peaceful man, but if someone accused me to sexual assault or pedophilia, or had someone attack me physically, it would take once before I went to their privet residence and changed their disposition with extreme malice.

GYP: Certainly you don’t think all the Vamps out there are just in it for the drama?

Six: Not at all. There are some damn fine people out there. I just don’t like where their community debates take me spiritually. I want to get in there and explain things, to try to be a peacekeeper, but I have seen out that works. The peacekeeper is attacked, the one making explanations is slighted unless they are years into the community.

I have found a few Houses I really respect. I would love to go to Michelle Belanger’s house gathering, or if Rose Mary ever decided to do and open house for her organization. So I know there are great vamps and people out there, but as far as facebook goes- I think you’re right about how the community should be called a “Bicker of Vampires”

The Moon Light Path is Lunacy!

 

By Ezra Canidea

GYP-©Dec 14 2014

“In my mind I can hear the wind in the trees. With my eyes closed I can still see the light of the moon paining the inside of lids a pale white. The smell of snow is in the air, though I know it has been years since any snow has fallen here. I’m home with my pack, and our energy is magic that flows through the trees, over the brooks and boulders. We are creatures of the wild, even though I am a creature of the couch.”

I found that things some call the Therian path many years ago. I was a child of fourteen or fifteen, and just kept finding myself drawn to the natural world. During storms I wanted to scream into the wind, or jump on my horse and ride toward the mountains. My father said I had the spirit of a Coyote and I agree with him in a manner of speaking.

I tell you this not because I think I am some Shaman with a coyote totem, or  skin walker, but it is how I found myself. Something inside me simply feels the inner coyote. Call it what you want to, a delusion, desire, or simply my way of dealing with life. I don’t honestly care what others say about it.

I named this article “The Moonlight Path is Lunacy” because while I have been wandering around the Therian and Otherkin, groups I mostly hear just that. Lunacy.

We do not physically shift. If those who tell me that some do shift physically would be so kind as to show me some physical evidence that isn’t contact lenses or computer graphics I might change my mind, but so far that hasn’t happened. I don’t have a need or desire to disprove another’s experience in how they feel, or what they believe spiritually, but if you are going to claim a physical shape shift into an animal, your words aren’t going to cut it.

In my spirituality we are all creatures of energy, creatures of many life times, a journey that is based on the idea of spiritual growth, not a human desire to be unique. Spirituality isn’t about who can make the most ridiculous claim, or what animal you think you secretly are. You are a human being with the energy of the universe locked inside you.

I say this because people need to stop fooling themselves and actually try to learn and grow. You won’t be able to explore great minds and thoughts if you are too busy looking on the internet for just the right fake teeth, or some program that lets you make digital pictures as you imagined yourself as a wolf.

There is no Alpha Wolf in nature I had read, and I believe that is true, so stop thinking that by claiming to be one, you somehow are more impressive than others. It only shows that you don’t really understand nature that well. Wolves don’t howl at the moon, they aren’t brave, or strong noble wild creatures, they simply are a species that has developed a way to survive. All humans do the same thing.

I am not saying that your energy isn’t touched by the wild. I believe it is. My energy was once part of a coyote, after all energy can never be destroyed, only changed, and I believe that in each change it takes something of what it was previously with it.

It would be foolish to say I know everything that is out there spiritually. I don’t know about dragons, or pixies, other things people in these groups talk about. I only know that we need to explore and learn, both inside ourselves and in the teachings of others. We need to do it with a discerning mind and allow our spirit guide us toward the growth it needs.

 

Sources: http://io9.com/why-everything-you-know-about-wolf-packs-is-wrong-502754629

http://www.wolfscience.at/en/aboutus/team/friederikerange/

 

Luciferians Plagued by Under Educated Christians

By Deacon Gray

GYP © 2014 Dec

It’s the holiday season and Christmas cheer is abound.  No better display of the Christian path can be displayed than the ones seen on Luciferians groups all over facebook.
“Satanic worshipers???? You shouldn’t be allowed to be on Facebook”.-FB post Charlene Kennedy
“You’ve Lost the battle. Jesus Wins. Read the book.”-FB Post Marilyn Covington

“Accepted Jesus into your heart and allow the darkness to be washed away by his light!”-FB Post Jason Hagans
“Let the angels of the Lord carry you from this abomination! Just like the beautiful angels bible says about.” –Rev Joan

Intrigued by such comments I decided to try to contact some of the people who had sent such wonderful season’s greetings.  Oddly enough, not many replied back for some reason. It seems making nasty posts to Facebook…I mean holiday greetings, weren’t something people wanted to share with a larger community.

I was beaten, I had given up hope on finding one of these holiday well wishers, when a Christmas Miracle took place I found someone who agreed to speak to me about her faith and why she feels that Luciferians deserve to be harassed by “Good Christian Women”

Not wishing to be harassed herself, she asked that her name be withheld from the article, so I decided to give her a anonymous name, she agree to. So starts my interview with Lady Lilitu,

GYP: Lady Lilitu, are you certain you are ok with this anonymous name?

LL “Yes, I always liked the name Lilith, it reminds me of that pretty dark haired bartender on “Cheers”

GYP:  Nice, would you tell us all a little about yourself?

LL: Certainly, I’m a life time member of my church, a home garden enthusiast and full time grandmother.”

GYP: Lady Lilitu, I found you because you posted on a few Luciferians groups, and I have to say those posts seemed pretty aggressive. “Spreading your satanic lies is a monstrosity! If you want to burn hell, that’s your choice, but don’t Sheppard the innocent with your filthy lies!”-Lady Lilitu

LL: There are a lot of young people who visit these sights out of curiosity. That’s pretty normal, but their hearts have not been hardened against the sweet lies of the damned. It is far too easy for young ones to hear these messages and have doubt creep into their hearts. They ears are plugged with the wax of  Satan’s own busy bees.
If they don’t have the chance to hear The Word, than it is all good Christians obligations to sing gods good graces.

GYP: Do you honestly feel that being mean on a facebook site will draw the innocent? Has it been successful for you?

LL:  I say hard things with love in my heart. Jesus said “god helps those who help themselves, but blessed are those who speak to my children”

GYP: could you tell me what line and verse that’s from? It seems like a mash up of a phrase from Shakespeare and a misquote from Luke.

LL: The Lord knows my heart, that’s all that matters.

GYP: wouldn’t he also know the hearts of the Luciferians and in knowing them have the sole place to judge them? “Judge not least you be judged, and so by your judgments shall you also be judged.”

LL: that is a urban legend, Jesus never said that. He spoke against the sinners, and told them not to sin anymore

GYP: Matthew 7:1-3 KJV Judge not, that ye be not judged.

² For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.

LL: If you want to misquote the bible to me, we can end this interview young man!

 

And sadly the interview did end right there. Lilitu, or Lilith mother of Demons, felt the interview was “a trap set by the Lord of The Flies”, and that she was fairly certain that I wasn’t a real Deacon.

I assured I was indeed Deacon Gray, and that the Lord of The Flies was a novel by William Golding, who I am certain wasn’t setting a trap for her. She declined to respond further.

Before you all start getting up in arms please remember a few things. This Lady Lilitu, yes I was mean in tricking her to use the name of a supposed demon, wasn’t at heart a Christian as much as she was a Christian at Ego.

Good people and bad can be found in any faith. Nasty people are in every community. I have friends who are Christians who have as much if not more understanding of the bible than most of those who you have heard of on TV or Radio and they abhor the direction some people take Jesus’ words and ideals. I also know some Luciferians who think the whole path is based on the idea of getting them laid.

In the end it is the holiday season, and no matter what faith you follow please try to remember kindness. Eat Drink and be Merry, for as Jesus said…”I’m totally hanging at Baccus` house on New Year’s Eve dude! He has kicken pad in Denver!”

 

 

Wicked Dreams on New Scenes

Exploring a Wicked Wonderland By Deacon Gray copyright March 2013 Let the “Deadmau5” and “Dreams an’ Stuff” of this world come and go; there can be little doubt that the Wicked Wonderland Empire is the premier mind-blower dark industrial psychedelica promotion ensemble of our time. The small city entertainment group originating in Boise, Idaho blew up at venues like “Contour” and “Stir” in Seattle, Washington Friday nights, and wove a cold program of multimedia perfection, with wicked people and a coloring book. I caught up with “The Redd Queen” Ginger Christainsen between performances with her band the “Lithium Dolls” and with an excited look on her face that reminds me at once of a dangerous Lolita wearing spikes and lace, she settles in for the serious moment. “I’m sure you have questions, but I’m bohemian at heart, always have been, and the wicked come first tonight!” She retreats to the stage, her bright red hair and baby girl red dress drawing the eyes of the crowd.  The group comes together and jumps right into ‘Psychosexual’. The crowd reacts in a frenzy as The Redd Queen moans passionately on stage, and I know for certain I am in for something new. Maybe it was the reference to Bohemia, maybe it was the bright attire that seemed to mix insanity with sexuality, but for whatever reason I suddenly felt like I was going to see Jim Morrison or Timothy Leery walk into the room. Ginger steps out of wonderland for a moment and sits back down at my table after the show; she blushingly smiles at me again. “It’s a good night.” She would know. Wicked Wonderland has been running parties and club nights for 12 years, has branched out in many other cities, and continues to grow. Trying to explain what Wicked Wonderland  is to someone who has never been to the event is a bit like trying to explain what a particular color looks like to someone who is blind–to truly understand this event, you must participate. With events like “Blood Bath” and the more mainstream events like the Clockwork Carnival, Wicked Wonderland has built a reputation for freaky, dark, industrial fun.  The Big news, however is that on May 1st, the first compilation album from their new record label will be available for sale.   TRQ: In a few short weeks bands on the label will have songs on the radio & in clubs internationally.   DG: Is that your focus for the future? I know Wicked Wonderland has always seemed to have a lot of projects under way, are you narrowing your focus to music?   TRQ: Doing the record label was just another part of a larger focus of creating a dark subcultural community that is step away from old labels (personal labels that is, such as just being goth or emo or what have you), old scene habits, elitism, and cattiness in order to move forward toward something that is more inclusive, artistic, and respectful. With the record label we are featuring artists that are truly creating art with their own sound & soul to help embody the voice of this movement. As we continue to add bands to the label, we will be looking for more of exactly that, artistic, painful, seductive, unique, twisted, beautiful.       DG: That sounds complex, but what makes it any better than other events?   TRQ: It is at heart the Ideal of being in love with beauty, art, adventure, and all things unusual that I’ve always run Wicked Wonderland. As I continue on building this empire, these are still the things that drive me on. When people come to a Wicked Wonderland event, they are not going to “another show” they are going to Burning Man, they are rolling in on their Harley Davidson to Sturgis they are having an experience.   DG: That is a pretty big goal. Those events took years to build and had a solid location; your events hit venues all over the west coast.   TRQ:  We are building a community where each individual brings their own unique flair to the army that is Wicked Wonderland; a community based on respect, compassion, unconventional tastes, & fun. I think each community, each city brings its own vital beauty to the events, each new place that holds a Wicked Wonderland event adds its own piece of Wonder Land history.   DG: Being spread out all over must have a lot challenges. How do you keep up?   TRQ: I have a lot of help. With friends like T’Rina and DJ’s like Bones, who are willing to invest a lot of their own time and energy into the events, I never feel like I have too much on my plate, I feel like I am surrounded by some of the most amazing friends a Red Queen could want. I wish I could never everyone who helps me out, the other Queen’s, each one of the Band members, the great Wicked Wonderland army of fellow dreamers, artists and creative souls, but if I started I would leave one of them out somewhere and the Wicked Wonderland Empire isn’t about any one of us anyway.   I think when you really think about it, we are all just the same people we were as kids. Remember how amazing our dreams were about the future back in those days when we hung out at the park? I never stopped dreaming, I never stopped seeing the wonder, and I don’t think I am the only one. The friends of the Wonderlanders have proven that really.     Please visit the home sites to find out what event is coming next! https://www.facebook.com/pages/Wicked-Wonderland-Empire/148230238540832?ref=ts&fref=ts http://wickedwonderlandempire.wordpress.com/